Slow bus to nowhere

It's raining

I can see it crashing against the window 

The droplets on the glass

Make strange patterns 

when they reflect with the lights all around 

I'm the only one on the bus

We are not moving

It's been this way for what feels like

An eternity 

It's bumper to bumper

And I can see blue flashing lights up ahead

So I'm guesing that something unpleasant has just gone down

I'm listening to the rat pack through my ear phones

Every now and then I like a bit of swing.

The only thing I want right now is my bed

But it seems so far away

I see a Costa express 

I would pay well over the odds now

For a double expresso 

and a double choc chip cookie

I need something to keep me awake

I remember I have some humbug in my pocket

I unwrap one and pop it in my mouth

I have some words in my head

That I'm sure have the makings of a poem

I grab a notebook and pen and scribble them down.

It's been such a long day

It's going to get longer 

If we don't move soon I'm going to miss my connection 

And end up having to get my head down

On a bench in the interchange 

I don't relish that prospect

As I know from experience the draught that blows through there is unforgiving.

I would love to go and make conversation with the driver

He has a lived in face

I would love to get to know his back story

But I get the feeling he isn't the type of bloke

Who will make small talk with a stranger.

My phone makes a beep, a text message

I take my phone from my inside pocket and glance at the screen

My heart skips a beat

It's from her - my muse

The one who got my literary juices flowing again

The one who put an end to my many months of writers block.

I was shocked that she wanted to see me again

I thought I had blown it

Our one and only date hadn't gone according to plan

I dropped a mug of coffee over her

I was mortified but she just laughed, and mopped herself down.

It hard come as a surprise to me when I  felt a connection 

She wasn't the type of girl I would usually go for

She wasn't a girly girl

She was a metal head, dressed all in black with tattoos

But there was something there that couldn't be ignored.

The first time I kissed her I felt it

I knew it was supposed to be

I felt at ease enough to open up to her

To tell her that I had been hurt in the past

But I thing she could read me well enough to know that

Now I'm dying inside

Because I'm stuck here and she's there

And I'm wishing I could reach out and touch her and whisper 'I love you.'

I used to be scared of that word

Love

I had convinced myself that I would never feel it again

Not after the last time

It was far too painful and I didn't want to put myself through it again

But her smile made me feel safe

She calmed me when she was around

And I knew that it was time to let go of my fears and trust again

I knewthat I could give my heart away 

Without fear of it being smashed to pieces 

So I'm not afraid of love anymore

I'm on a high 

And no drugs are required

To put me on that high

And I can be possitive about the future again

Just as long as I get off this slow bus to nowhere.